Elaine’s Story
In March 2024 I had a mammogram done and found out that I had a lump in my right breast that was positive for breast cancer. This was a follow-up appointment to my annual physical from my primary care physician, who found it when she conducted a routine breast exam. The initial biopsy stated I was Grade 3, mixed invasive carcinoma with lobular and ductal features. At my first appointment with my clinical team, I was told this type of cancer contributes to less than 5% of breast cancer cases, and the average age was 57. I was 38 years old, and my family has no genetic predisposition to breast cancer. The doctors had no explanation why I had this type of cancer other than it was environmental. In addition, there was little research on this type because of the small percentage of women who have this diagnosis, and an even smaller ratio for women under 40. At this point I felt the world fall from under my feet and I was spinning.
I was speaking with one of my colleagues about my diagnosis and the potential plan (We wouldn't know for sure the entire course of treatment until I had my lumpectomy and the pathology results back), when another colleague down the hallway of the school came over and told me she heard about my breast cancer diagnosis, and that she went through this two years ago as well. Her cancer was also estrogen and progesterone positive. She said if I needed anything to call or stop by her classroom. Not understanding fully the journey I was about to embark upon, I said thank you and then went about my day. I was naive to how much this cancer would impact and change my life, but I would be very thankful for my colleague’s offer for support in the future.
On April 23, 2024 I had a partial mastectomy (lumpectomy) and a sentinel node biopsy. During my surgery they removed a lymph node and a sentinel node, and my tumor was 3.5 inches around, essentially the size of a golf ball. While I was healing from my surgery, I watched a documentary on elephants. I have always loved elephants; they are mystical and adaptive. They have overcome adversity, harsh weather conditions, predators, and human impact changing the environment and needing protection due to poachers. Before and after my surgery, I had many female colleagues reach out to send their prayers, warm thoughts, and well wishes. As I watched the documentary I learned two new things about elephants: The males are pushed out of the herd when they reach 2 years of age, and the female elephants stay in a herd together, protecting each other. When a female is ill or weak, one or two from the herd will stay back with her until she is ready to catch up, ensuring she is safe and protected. When a female gives birth, the herd surrounds her and the baby, throwing dust into the air to cover the smell of the placenta to ensure predators do not take advantage of a meal opportunity. This reminded me of the women who stepped into my life to ensure I was fully supported when I was at my weakest, and it resonated strongly with me.
Once the pathology reports came back from my surgery, we learned that I was fortunate to not have any lymphatic spread of my cancer: this meant I didn’t need to complete chemotherapy! However, due to the aggressiveness of my cancer I was advised to complete 19 rounds of radiation. In addition, I would be starting an anti-hormone therapy to “smoke out” my inactive cancer cells for the next 7-10 years in order to mitigate metastatic recurrence. Little did I know the lumpectomy would be the easiest part of my cancer treatment journey, but I would soon find out.
Radiation went daily smoothly until the final week. During this time I had some burns appear along my torso, and the fatigue began to set in. I was still able to do most things, but I needed to take a nap during the day to complete all of my tasks. Ten days after my final treatment, the harsher side effects of the radiation set in. I basically could only get up, complete my tasks at work, then I needed to come home and take a 2-3 hour nap, ate dinner, and went back to bed around 8 PM. At this point I felt like a complete burden to my husband. Then the hormone shutdown process began. I was told this would take 3-4 months to get into menopause, however, I went from 115 points in my estrogen to 10 points in one month. It only took my body one month to drop into menopause. This, in addition to the extreme fatigue from radiation, also made me tired, and amplified every side effect of menopause. There was one evening I told my husband that I didn’t understand why he stayed married to me because I felt like I was a huge burden. He looked at me and said, “Remember your compass, who you are. I didn’t marry you for household chores or items. I married you because of who you are, your character. I will be here and I am not leaving. I support you when you are down, just like I know you would support me. We are a team.” Our plan moving forward was for me to continue to work so that we could keep our health benefits to pay for my treatment plan, and my husband would carry the rest of the responsibilities until I was better. He did this for an entire year, and I am forever grateful for my husband’s support.
While I was going through treatment, I met a lot of women that were struggling financially to pay their bills, rent, and medical treatments. Many had kids at home and were worried about food security and other essentials due to the high costs of medical expenses. I was fortunate that my husband and I both make good incomes and I have fantastic health insurance through my employer. Overall, if we had not had insurance, we would have spent over $165,000 on my medical treatments, and I didn’t even need to have chemotherapy. This is where my husband and I thought of Herd of Courage.
We wanted to create something that allowed women to feel connected and a part of the community when they are going through their breast cancer journey. Each journey is unique to each woman, yet we all understand the same themes that arise: Medical bills, lethargy, pain, exhaustion, isolation, and extreme changes happening to our body in a very short amount of time. I felt I lost my community of women when I was forced into menopause. How would my friends, in their 30s and early 40s, really understand what was happening to me? How could my friends who had gone through menopause understand how different this process is when it is forced upon your body instead of it happening naturally?
Relics have been used in history to help people feel connected and a part of a community. Think of the cross, or a mascot for a school. They bring people together for a common cause. My husband and I have created a bracelet to remind women at their initial diagnosis, throughout treatment, and during their long term plan, that there is a herd of women standing with them, to guide them if they lose themselves or are unsure, and to support them throughout the journey.
The bracelet we created has rose quartz beads in it, which symbolizes the therapeutic properties of unconditional love, compassion,and emotional healing. This is what I consistently felt throughout my journey from women who understood what I was going through. The black onyx beads symbolizes protection, strength, and grounding. It will help create inner strength and stability, and is associated with overcoming challenges and determination for the person wearing it. There are three charms on it in sterling silver. The compass is a reminder to remember your values during the toughest of times and who you are as a person. It also is a reminder that other breast cancer survivors and thrivers are here to guide you with support when you need or want it. The ribbon is symbolic of the breast cancer survivorship and the women who have overcome and continue to overcome the harsh realities of this disease. Finally, the elephant represents all of the women in our herd. The women who will be here to support, guide, and lift you up when you are walking your unique journey. This is our motto: Unique and Unified. And the name of our company, Herd of Courage, gives honor and a community for all of the women facing their personal story with breast cancer.
A portion of each sale from Herd of Courage will go to helping women pay medical expenses, living expenses, and other financial matters to help alleviate some of their stress that shouldn’t be a focus when they are trying to heal and move forward with their cancer treatment plan. This is one small way my husband and I can give back to a community that welcomed, supported, and continues to support me through my journey with breast cancer.
